Dear Mama,
After months and months of working here, I think that I have finally settled in and it is all thanks to Miss Abigail. She has started talking to me like I am her confidant! It is all very scandalous content that I am in no way to share with anyone else, but as you do not know her, or anyone here, I am sure that it is acceptable to inform you of the goings on she speaks of. I know how much you love good gossip, mama!
These white people have no sense of goodness! All of them preach about how holy they are and that they never miss a Sunday service and yet they all commit sins like it is a fashion statement! No one person treats the other with respect! Oh yes, to their faces they are the definition of cordial, but once eye contact is broken, they chatter horrible truths about their so called “friends”. At first, this added to my discomfort at living here, but now that Miss Abigail has made me her private confidant, it’s now become a source of entertainment for me. Especially as I now know what they are all chattering about!
First of all, the Reverend Parris has been spreading the message of God as he fears that witchcraft is starting to grow within Salem. I fear that this could be true as Miss Abigail has told me that some curious things have been occurring in the town. People have been seen walking around with the devils book, speaking in tongues and even running naked through the forest! Imagine that mama! Such a disturbing sight to envisage. However Miss Abigail has also informed me that it is not as bad as people have said. She says that it’s people who are angry or upset at other people and are seeking their revenge on the others by spreading nasty rumours about them. Salem folk are so angry!
Miss Abigail’s friends are the absolute WORST mama! The only reason they talk to me is because Miss Abigail herself has told them to but I have seen them when they aren’t around her, They are cruel and nasty about me and I can tell by the way they stare at me while whispering behind their hands. It makes me so mad. I have it in my mind to make them regret treating me like they do. Luckily Abigail seems to have some kind of control over them.
I have saved the best for last, mama. The big scandal that Miss Abigail herself is privy to. First I should explain the situation Miss Abigail finds herself in. She works for the Proctor’s as maid and has had feelings for the man of the house, Mr. John Proctor, for a while. Until recently, he had shown her no acknowledgement other than a dip of the head when he passes her. However, as of last night, she and Mr. Proctor are now more than just employee and employer. That is right mama; Mr. Proctor committed adultery, a most unforgivable sin, with Miss Abigail! She was very excited and happy when she told me and I had to hold back my distaste lest she grow mad with me. But I know that I can speak truthfully to you, mama. What is it about these people that think committing sins is a good thing? How do they come up with these ideas and think that it is okay? Do they not care about others feelings? Poor Mrs. Proctor, if she ever found out! I could not imagine the pain that she would experience, nor would I like to.
Anyway, it is time for me to retire to my bed, I have stayed up very late writing this letter to you and have an early morning tomorrow. I hope that everyone is well at home and I will write again soon.
Sincerely,
Tituba.
Dear Mama,
Even though people still look down to me as the slave that I am, I am glad to have Miss Abigail on my side. Not only has she supplied me with a confidant and friend but she has also introduced me to her friends who don’t seem to look down on me as much anymore. There is no snickering or evil looks from them towards me, instead it is I whom they whisper secrets and comments to. I finally feel like I belong. I have friends, mama! It is a great feeling.
This is just a short letter to tell you how happy I am feeling here in Salem. Ever since Miss Abigail befriended me, it has been smooth sailing! But I must go, we are going to the town square to meet Mary and Betty. I will write again soon!
Sincerely,
Tituba.
Dear Mama,
I am sorry for not writing for a while. I have been very busy with Miss Abigail and her friends. We have been spending a lot of time out and about the town. However, Miss Abigail is slowly starting to spend more time with Mr. Proctor who has continued his interest in her despite his marriage to Mrs. Elizabeth Proctor. As much as I love my new friend, I do not agree with her interference in these poor peoples’ marriage. But I cannot say anything to her lest she grows mad with me.
Another bad thing is that it seems that Miss Abigail’s group of girls only treat me like a friend when she is around and with her spending a lot of her time with Mr. Proctor, they have no interest in me any longer. Not that I mind, I much prefer the company of Miss Abigail, but I was getting used to having people to talk to and now there is no one, just the fleeting moments when Miss Abigail is around to chat.
Oh well, I suppose I shouldn’t have pictured myself as one of them, I am but a lowly black servant and even though Miss Abigail herself does not have much of a social standing, she is still more welcome in society than I.
I must attend to my chores, Reverend Parris has been yelling at me for the past ten minutes. I miss you, mama. I will write again soon.
Sincerely,
Tituba.
Dear Mama,
Oh those girls make me so very mad! Remember in my last letter how they started treating me like an insider but then stopped after Miss Abigail continued to see Mr. Proctor? Well now that Miss Abigail really is out of the picture for the time being, as she is currently spending all of her spare time with the adulterer, they are starting to talk about me again. And not just the evil whispers and staring, but they’ve started to completely ignore my existence when I come near them. This makes it awfully difficult when I am making a delivery from Reverend Parris to their families, as they will act as if I am simply not there. Luckily, the maids at their homes have noticed this and have started coming to the doors when they see me arriving so as not to waste my time. It is very aggravating.
The worst offender is Sarah Osbourne! I dislike this girl with all of my being! She always finds a way to undermine me. Everything I say, she will cut over me. Just the other day, I asked Betty,
“Have you seen Miss Abigail around recently?”
To which Sarah, not Betty, replied, whilst pointing in my direction,
“Did you hear something Betty? I think there was an annoying sounds coming from over that direction?”
I was so infuriated. I wanted to throw my bag at her and hurt her the way she hurt me. Instead I ran back to Reverend Parris’ and went straight to my room and cried. Such hurtful things should not be said. These people don’t care about me, no one does, I’m not even sure if Miss Abigail really does. Why do they hate me mama? Why does it matter that my skin is a darker colour than theirs? It’s not fair.
Darn it! It’s almost five in the evening and I am yet to start dinner. Reverend Parris is having some guests around and I am to make a large stew for them all. Hopefully my tears will stop falling before they see me. If not, I suppose I could say it was from the onions.
I miss you very much mama. You and everyone back home. Give them my love, I will write again soon.
Sincerely,
Tituba.
Dear Mama,
Well, it has finally happened! Mrs. Proctor finally found out about Mr. Proctor and Miss Abigail’s promiscuous affair. I’m surprised it lasted this long as they weren’t very careful with hiding it. Miss Abigail has been telling nearly everyone what has been going on! Not surprisingly, Mr. and Mrs. Proctor have not divorced or even told anyone about what has happened and I presume that this is so they can keep their social standing. Pride always comes first in these peoples’ minds.
All of Miss Abigail’s friends knew what was going on, but I was the only one who she shared all the details with. It seems like our friendship is becoming strong again. We spend nearly all of our time together because she is no longer preoccupied with Mr. Proctor and as she was asked to leave their house, she no longer has an occupation. I know the entire story, but mama, I don’t think you’d like to hear it.
However, despite our growing friendship, I can’t help but notice that Miss Abigail is a lot tenser these days. Just yesterday, we were talking about her situation, which started with her saying,
“It’s just not fair, Tituba!” she said while sipping a glass of wine she had stolen from Reverend Parris’ communion chest.
“I know it’s not, Miss Abigail, but you knew that it could not last forever. Mr. Proctor is a married man, if he had planned to leave his wife for you, he would’ve done it a long time ago.”
Saying this was a very big mistake because Miss Abigail took it the wrong way and replied with,
“EXCUSE ME? John Proctor loves me! He isn’t just going to forget about me, you foolish slave!”
“Sorry! I’m so sorry Miss Abigail! I did not mean it that way! I didn’t realise that you two were still in love. Please forgive me!” I begged.
“Oh I know you didn’t mean it that way, Tituba. How could you understand something so intense as love? It’s not like you will ever have a chance to experience it. I’m sorry, I forgot that you weren’t of the same social standing as I. Anyway, John Proctor and I will be together in the future, I can tell. Elizabeth is just an obstacle in my way and I will rid my life of this obstacle very soon.”
It was very scary mama. I did not want to lose her as a friend and so I had to bite my tongue from continuing and just nodded. It seems as if Miss Abigail has something planned that I do not know about. That scares me, mama, as I do not know what to expect.
Well, it’s time for me to turn in, I hope that everything is well at home. Write me back soon.
Sincerely,
Tituba.
Dear Mama,
I’m not sure what is happening, but it seems that Miss Abigail has found a way to get over her problems with the Proctors, however I am unaware of at what cost. Miss Abigail came into my room earlier this night and approached me with a proposition. Remember how I told you in my previous letter that Miss Abigail wanted to remove Mrs. Proctor from her life so that she could be with Mr. Proctor? Well, it seems as if she has come up with a plan.
“Tituba, tomorrow night, we are to go into the woods,” Miss Abigail said as she came into the room.
“We are, Miss Abigail? But why?” I was very confused at why she wanted me to go to the woods with her.
“We are going to perform a kind of voodoo that will rid John Proctor of his evil wife and bind him to me forever!”
I was not sure of how to respond to this, and believed her to be joking, so I just said,
“I’m not sure if that would work, Miss Abigail, I have never done any voodoo and I do not believe that you have either.”
“What? But you are a black woman, isn’t that meant to be your kind’s religion?”
“I have told you and everyone else that I am a woman of God, the God above and no other godlike myth. I do not know any voodoo, nor have I ever wanted to know it!”
Seriously mama, these people have such a low opinion of us.
Miss Abigail continued as if I had not spoken, “I need you to find me a chicken, Tituba, for tomorrow night.”
“What do you need a chicken for, Miss Abigail?” I was afraid of the answer but had to ask anyway.
“Don’t you worry, my dear, just get it. You’re the only person I trust with this task and this information. I haven’t told anyone else why we are going to the woods, they believe it is just for some midnight party.”
“But Miss Abigail, what if someone catches us? We will get in trouble for consorting with the devil!”
Miss Abigail laughed at that and said, “Don’t you worry, no one will catch us,” before she retired to her room.
I am afraid of what is in stock for me tomorrow night, mama. Pray for me, pray it was only a joke.
Sincerely,
Tituba.
Mama,
I can’t believe what is happening here! Abigail, after all of her promises and confidence in me, has shown her true colours and they are that of a fake! I can’t believe her and Betty. They are horrible, horrible girls! I understand that none of this makes sense but I am in such a rush that I will have to finish this letter later as I am about to be put on trial for witchcraft! WITCHCRAFT! Pray for me, mama, God knows the citizens of Salem won’t.
Sincerely,
Tituba.
Mama,
Befriending Abigail and her evil group of white girls has been a grave mistake. I have been put in jail for my faults. I now have time to explain everything to you and I pray that you have mercy on me, I did not know that the consequences would be this dire.
Late last night, the girls and I escaped to the woods for some midnight activities. I was under the pretence that we were just going to talk and possibly make a campfire to keep warm. Instead, Abigail professed her anger and jealousy at Elizabeth Proctor for not allowing her husband to see Abigail and proceeded to make claims of satanic faith by pulling out a knife, killing a chicken and drinking it’s blood. It was a horrific sight mama!
The next thing I know, Abigail turns to me and says,
“Tituba, my friend, teach us your voodoo ways!”
I wasn’t sure what to do but foolish me felt a bond to Abigail and a grudge at Betty and the others and so told them,
“You must take off your clothes and run through the forest singing and chanting to Satan. Drink of the chicken’s blood, like Miss Abigail, and celebrate!”
I know mama, I feel horrible that I have spoken like that but I must admit that it was an entertaining sight to see them all running around like the headless chicken they were drinking from. However, the next day, Betty was ill and Reverend Parris had to call for Reverend Hale to look over her. Reverend Hale is the town’s witchcraft expert who knows what he is looking for when it comes to possession and other evil things. Abigail arrived, as did John Proctor and a few of Abigail’s group from the night before. Reverend Hale then proceeded to question them.
“Do you know what is wrong with her? What were you doing last time you saw her? Tell me the truth, girls.”
They opened their mouths to answer and didn’t finish until they had explained everything that happened last night and, last of all, that I had lead everything. Me! A worker of Satan! I immediately regretted the joke I had played earlier the night before but I had to say something, lest I look guilty. So I told them the truth at first,
“I am a woman of God! I believe in the father above! It was just a bit of humour that I was creating. In no way did I actually mean the false voodoo I spoke of!”
However, they refused to believe me and so I did the only thing that I could do, I confessed,
“Yes, I have partaken in witchcraft, however I have also seen many others talk to the Devil in his tongue and own his creatures! Sarah Osbourne for example!”
Yes, it was bad to claim such atrocities mama, I know, but it was the only way that they would listen. I have now been put on trial and am now in a jail cell, awaiting the jury’s decision. Sarah has been put on trial also and I don't think she's getting let off as easily as I, she just makes me so mad! Not that it matters now. Nothing really matters anymore. It's over, it seems. I feel horrible, so I will pray for Sarah, that she receives the mercy of God.
I am so sorry for everything mama. I know you must have condemned me to hell after reading this letter. I wish that none of this had ever happened. I curse the day Abigail Williams showed me attention. I miss you so much and wish that I could come back to you and father and the family. Maybe if I get let off, I will. That is, if you will let me.
Pray for me, mama,
Sincerely,
Tituba.
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